First Night Of Taraweeh

Last night was our first night of taraweeh. Last year I don’t remember going to the masjid at all for taraweeh and the year before that, I was pregnant and couldn’t stand for long and had a 1 year old to take care of and the year before that, I had to sit in the back of the masjid to keep my kids under control, so I missed most of the salah. Although I thought I would once again spend most of taraweeh sitting in the back, my kids were unexpectedly very well behaved. My step- daughter, 5 year old daughter, and 3 year old son all stood for taraweeh. I hold my 1 year old………. the whole salah, which you’ll later see was veryyyy long. My 5 year old hung in there until the 6th rakat. I’ve never felt more proud of her than I did standing foot to foot for taraweeh with my little girl. I couldn’t help but smile at her concentration and trying to tough it out. My 3 year old hung in there until the 7th rakat. He didn’t want to sit down, but since he started crouching over, I figured it was time to sit down. My step daughter, who’s 13, stand for most of taraweeh, but her legs got tired so I told her to pray sitting down. After 8 rakats, I expected the witr salat, but when I realized the rakat was much longer than witr salat would be, I realized they prayed 21 rakats there instead of the 11 I was used to at the masjid I usually attend. I muchhhhh prefer 11. I felt like I was praying for hours. Somehow the 11 seems shorter to me even though the rakats are longer. Anyway, Alhamdulillah, I was able to stand for the whole taraweeh. I felt like my feet were on fire and at times like I was about to pass out, especially since I was holding my 1 year old almost the entire time because there were 2 doors for him to leave the musalla so he kept trying to make a mad dash for them.

So today is my first day fasting in years. So far, I feel a little hunger, but I’m trying to keep busy reading Qur’an, folding laundry, blogging (lol). I’ll probably listen to a lecture after this. No tv while I’m fasting, so hopefully this will lead to my ultimate goal of no tv at all. I was so cranky for suhoor. We didn’t get in from taraweeh till about 12:30 and I ate before putting my kids to bed and going to bed myself, so I was pretty tired and I’m not a morning person to begin with. Insha Allah, everyone has a good fast and does beneficial things during their fast. Assalaamu Alaykum.

Control

A lot of people say muslim women wear hijab to stop men from behaving a certain way with them. I would like to say… I cannot control the way any man thinks or acts. I wear hijab because Allah ordered me to. Because being modest is a part of being a muslim. And yes, one of the purposes of wearing hijab is to be known as a muslim woman and so as not to be annoyed and harassed. This being said, men are men. If a man has a dirty mind or is just plain old crazy, he will think what he wants when he looks at me regardless. I cannot control what any man thinks when he sees me, but, with my hijab, I can control what he sees of me. I don’t think every man is a rapist or some lust-crazed maniac, but my hijab is a protection from those that are. Just as a person locks their doors at night, not because they think everyone is a burglar, but because they know some people are. Both are done as a protection against the evils that we all know some people have in them.